Tag Archives: Utah

Forgive us our debts…

ImageIn the late 1890s, the Mormon Church was deeply in debt. Lorenzo Snow, the then-president of the faith, prayed for help and inspiration. Thus, came the revelation of the modern tithe, as announced in 1899 in St. George, Utah. Within a few short years, the Church was out of debt. And we NEVER will be in debt again. Never. Not to brag or sound worldly, but the cash flow of the LDS church has been surging ever since (hint: We. Are. Rich. But we use the money well and none of our leaders are paid!)

ImageThough I know this is probably impossible, I sure wish our modern government would take SOME sort of look at how we (Latter-day Saints/Mormons) do things.  Cuz we know how to get things done, be efficient, be responsible stewards with our money and properties.  And there is no one in his/her right mind who can say the same about the United States.  Trillions of dollars in the hole doesn’t just go away…

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We need more than just a passing glance

at the efficiency of Mormon finance!

🙂

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Community.

television show that I don’t watch…

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wanna make it great?  just add a gate!

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“I’ll get community service…

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   no matter which law I break!”

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exercising one’s First Amendment Rights

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the guy who founded this restaurant is Mormon! 

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                                                                                                               watch his story!

and I’m suddenly hungry

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Oh Karl and Freddy, I’m sure you meant well,

but your ideas (or at least the misinterpretation of them)

have caused SOOOOO many problems. 

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Communities cannot survive without communication.

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And communities cannot survive without communiKATHERINE!

🙂

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Very rarely does a song capture pretty much everything I believe about what a man should and SHOULDN’T expect of his girlfriend (in a way that is both refreshingly true and also hilarious!)

This is one of those songs.

Not only that, but musically it’s a great song as well (blending a ton of instruments/ genres).

Oh, and Shedaisy is Mormon too.  Don’t hate that!

And their name was derived from a Navajo word that their brother learned on his full-time LDS mission.  Cool!

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More to come from these girls.  I like them a LOT.

I won’t be your Martha Stewart baby, or your all-night restaurant. 

But I WILL be your everything!

🙂

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“Blagging”

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Is bragging about your blog.

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I try hard not to do that, but no promises.  I am only human after all:

Oh and speaking of, Brandon Flowers IS Mormon.  Check it out!

And just back to blagging for one second, yes I have earned money, yes, I do have readers in 34 countries, yes I have made friends and helped others’ network as well, yes I have been able to email people in Alaska about the Book of Mormon, yes I have people contacting me about product reviews, and yes I am happy.  But I digress…

🙂

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“It’s hard to be black and not Mormon living in Provo,”

said a new friend to me recently.  Again, I’m a WASM woman, so I won’t pretend to understand.  But I feel for you bro.  And you always have a friend in me…

 

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A new friend, a compliment, and an answered question all in one blog post-TRIPLE WHAMMY!

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This is Alan (he is very good looking and gave me permission to use his name, but asked to not have his picture included).  He is a new friend who lives with his sister and brother-in-law here in Utah having recently moved from Long Beach, California.  I don’t know him very well yet, but I can tell he is a good man who respects women, works hard, and is seeking truth.  Alan is currently investigating the Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-day Saints.  I ain”t gonna hide the fact that I hope he joins, but whatever he decides, I am glad to have a new friend!  Oh, and he sent me the following in an email.  Totes made this girl’s day!

hey katherine it was really good meeting you yesterday. i didnt have time to read all of your blogs but i did get a chance to read the one about sex and the temple and ill say it did answer alot of my question. i didnt know it was that sacred. ill view more of your blogs when i have more time. you a very talented individual and i hope you succeed in your blogs. hope your day goes well.

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Oh, and Alan’s sister is into eyelashes, too.  Love this family already 🙂

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The Surprise of a Lifetime!

This is Thomas:

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Thomas is a convert to the Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-day Saints.  He attended Southern Virginia University (where he did music with my mama!), and after graduating, made the brave decision to serve a full-time LDS mission at the age of 24.  When making a quick stop in Utah to stock up on missionary gear, Thomas experienced a BIG surprise.  Check it out!

So awesome, huh?  Actually, he was one of 15 soon-to-be missionaries who got this star treatment:

Read the full article here: 

Godspeed, Thomas!  And Deseret First Credit Union, mad props.

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I was a satirist…

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before I even fully knew what that meant!

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Alexander Pope and Jonathan Swift would be so proud!

Check out my approach to satire here. 

For those who may not quite understand, I was exploiting the stereotype that Mormon girls often get married and pregnant very young.  Here is another self-satire.

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My present to you for making it to the 400th post? RAP VIDEO!

No beatin’ around the bush on that title (figuratively OR literally)!  I had my NEW friend Kemp and my OLD friend Carlos help me out.  Check it stat (and please excuse my being a little dance happy.  I’m not as smooth/subtle as my friends):

And if you think that was entertaining (probably mainly because Katherine was making a fool of herself), it actually wasn’t anything compared to what these guys can do for real.  Here’s just a taste of their INSANE TALENT.  And yes Mom, the following is improvised.

Here’s Carlos’s youtube channel. 

And here’s Kemp’s twitter. 

Oh, and just had to include this one too:

🙂

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There were a lot of good things about the John Mayer concert,

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but this is definitely in the top 3.

The whole thing is AMAZING, but if I had to pick one or two lines to highlight, it would be this:

So when you start feeling like the world’s coming down on you, and that somebody feels like you’re not good enough or smart enough or thin enough, and that’s getting sent to you, like a psychic getting sent to ya, like a pyschic getting sent to ya, just ask for names.  And guess what?  There are no names.  It’s all just fog, it’s all just a made up fog in a hall of mirrors, it’s all garbage, it doesn’t exist, so just do away with all that negative energy; it doesn’t even exist, it’s not even real….when people see other people having a good time and not questioning it, they just like to bring it all down, ya know.  “I WANT NAMES!” from now on.  And let me tell you something.  I’ve been through my life, and I got bumped, and I got bruised, and I got kicked to the ground., but I never actually got a name the whole time.  And therefore, I disregard all of it, and assume that I am loved the world round. 

Whoops, guess that was a few more than 2 lines.  If it’s all meat, you can’t cut any out!

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What do these two things have in common?

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?

They both are forms of this!

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If you are looking like Bob Marley,

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I can’t take my eyes off of you.

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I will NEVER be as cool as Natasha Bedingfield,

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but I can still do this every once and a while:

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I don’t need a microphone to say what I’ve been thinking.

My heart is like a loudspeaker, that’s always on 11.

The stripping going on is NOT literal, people!

🙂

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Poetry vs. Sunshine

ImageDon’t think I didn’t catch that reference, Mindy!  Nothing flies past my Natasha radar.  Haha, she inspires a lot of us I guess 🙂  I’m not too familiar with your stuff, but I guess I’ll have to check it out sometime….and I’m TOTES up for collaboration.  Just sayin’

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My (near perfect) approach to satire…

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When it comes to our world and its issues, there is a lot to say!

… And a lot to criticize

There are absolutely times when it’s important to speak plainly and even harshly.  To reprove with sharpness (Doctrine and Covenants 121:43) , and to not beat around the bush (From what I understand, my grandfather Ernest Wilkinson often preferred this approach.).

So I occasionally will speak harshly (but still intelligently!) about subjects, but my passion does not overrule my logic (and vice versa).

Here are 2 of my strongest examples yet:

1)  Some Mansions

2)  Halloween Costume from Hell

And there are certain topics that Katherine simply will not explore in a comedic way (humor is great, but out of bounds can be dangerous, obscene, and grossly offensive).

You will never see any joke on my blog about racism, abuse, pornography, or violence.  

And it is NOT that I am afraid of alienating readers (although I do seek to maintain them!).  It is that those jokes are not a part of my life AT ALL, and therefore most certainly will not be part of my blog.

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However, when it comes to less serious (but still important!) issues like modesty, time spent on Facebook, and dating, things that are relevant to many people but are especially present in my psyche as a Mormon living in Provo, I like to (try to) be  funny!  I often think deeply about the issue (let it cook in the crock-pot of my mind for a while), but usually say very little.  It’s that whole “economy of words” things again.

Sure I know how to write 15 page papers, but in this case, I think that often the less said, the better.  Brevity IS the soul of wit, ya’ll! As long as what you are saying is funny, uplifting, entertaining, honest, but still speaks an important truth and sparks discussion and thought, I believe that often the point gets across most clearly and perfectly.  The idea of “truth in jest” shows up in almost all of my posts, and it is the core of my approach to satire.

(2 Shakespeare references in 1 paragraph-not bad!)

Two of my greatest influences in this respect are Ellen DeGeneres and Brad Paisley.  Both are brilliant comedians and satirists (Brad is also extremely good looking and could shred a guitar to pieces), but are NOT preachy or unkind.  They respect the intelligence of their audience.  And I believe this is what makes them so good.  Check out these two examples:

Well done, you two.  Well done.  Thanks so much for your inspiration.

And now back to the woman of the hour…

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My satire may not be perfect, but it is funny, witty, occasionally sexy, intelligent, clean, refreshing, and overall pretty darn awesome, if I do say so myself.

🙂

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Satire

Sat on a tire

Kat sat on a tire

I’m tired, BYE!

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My Fan Video to Andy Grammer

Remember when I got a little kiss from Andy Grammer?  Well I worked REALLY hard for the opportunity to get those meet-and-greet passes.  I even had to do this.  And yes, I am confident enough to share:

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Shout out to my boy Neil!

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Just another shout out to this amazing human being, Neil Pasricha, author of the Webby-award winning blog 1000 awesome things.  Thanks for inspiring me, giving me hope and confidence, and also being a HUGE PART of the creation of this blog!

Hey Mr. PASRICHA, did you see my post about a PASHMINA scarf?  See what I did there?

Seriously though, Neil, come on out to Salt Lake.  Bring your girlfriend with you.  We’ll have a swell time.  And I’m sure with the dough you’re rolling in you can afford to take me out to eat.  Think of the traffic it would do to BOTH our blogs!  And this ain’t no truth in jest invitation.  This is….dead serious 🙂

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Every once in a while, the experience is BETTER than the myth.

Example: Car Salesperson
Myth:
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Experience:
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This is Kenneth Christofferson (along with his lovely wife Leslie).  He was my LDS bishop and continues to be a great friend and father figure to me and to countless others.  This man’s name is no coincidence-he is a Christlike person who defies all stereotypes of the sketchy car-salesman.  Bishop Christofferson has helped me out of many a bind, both spiritual and physical (you better believe he’s helped me more than once with my car!).  He works at Ken Garff Chevrolet in American Fork, Utah (Ken works for Ken!).  If you are in the market for a new car, check them out!  http://www.kengarffchevrolet.com/
And yes, I got his full permission for this post.  And no, he’s not paying me. 🙂
Readers!
 Who do YOU know that shatters negative stereotypes?
And who do you know who confirms stereotypes that writers are a little goofy?
holding grudges over love is ancient artifacts…

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Rearrange the Letters

Will you be in Utah next summer? Great, we can go to Uintah!

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#yes I really do want you to come visit me in Utah

#yes we really can go to Uintah if you want (along with a whole lot of other places)

#Mom didn’t you go to school in Uintah?

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“Everybody loses, we all got bruises”

“It’s good to know you got a friend, you’re not alone in how you been. Everybody loses.  We all got bruises.”

*trudat!

*some literal, some not…

bruises

(I got this the first and only time I went skiing)

*looks like it was filmed in Utah but actually Colorado

*I am doing my own version of this song with a guy friend in a couple weeks…stoked!

*this song reminds me of Heather and also a couple other cool people

Core Beliefs:  kindness, humor, beauty, expression, understanding, Christ

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An unexpected metaphor

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Warning: I am about to make a comparison between 2 things that are seemingly very different and potentially the slightest bit controversial. But just know that in John Donne’s famous poem, “Batter my Heart,” he compares spiritual conversion to sexual violence.  Mine is no where near that bad, and John Donne has been quoted in Mormon General Conference!  (So now that I’ve established my ethos a bit, onward I go!)  The following subject matter is not offensive, obscene, or inappropriate I believe, but it does concern an adult theme.  But it’s all good cuz I’m not worried about Miss Rosemary or Mr. William reading this just yet 🙂

SEX AND TEMPLES
Many people wonder why only certain people go inside Mormon temples.  There have been feelings of exclusion, privilege, secrecy, and us. vs them.  I was born and raised in the church and I struggled with it.  All through Young Women’s I heard, “you’re gonna get married in the temple.  you are the princess.  you will be so beautiful.  TEMPLE MARRIAGE RULES!”  I felt alone, and I thought I couldn’t ask questions or voice my feelings of nervousness, not wanting to do the whole temple experience, etc.  I didn’t buy the whole “sacred, not secret” thing.  I felt like it wasn’t fair that I would have to commit to something that I didn’t know beforehand.  I didn’t want to wear garments.  But I thought:  I CAN’T TALK ABOUT THIS BECAUSE EVERYONE LOVES THE TEMPLE AND THE TEMPLE IS SO AWESOME, ETC. AND WE DON’T TALK ABOUT THE TEMPLE SPECIFICS..so I lived in silent fear, shame.
As I got older I began to understand that it was okay to ask questions, be nervous, have doubts, and my anxiety began to lessen.

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2 years ago a Christian friend visited me in Provo.  He asked me questions about the church.  I don’t know if he wanted to join, but he wasn’t antagonistic or trying to prove me wrong or anything.  We walked on temple grounds.  He loved it and took lots of pictures (he was a photographer).  He asked me why only Mormons could go in…..the sometimes dreaded question.  (though again he was earnestly asking; not offended or being antagonistic).  In that moment I had a thought come to my mind that was definitely not my own (at least not completely).  TEMPLES ARE LIKE SEX.  Let’s talk about sex first because that’s the one everyone is interested in.

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   In Christianity, God says sex is only between 2 people who are married.  It is natural.  It is good.  It is beautiful.  But when you take sex and put it all over the internet or the magazines or the songs, when you pervert and abuse it, it is wrong, it is offensive, sinful, shameful….ETC…when a couple is married, they have sex!  It is not a secret, not shameful or sinful.  And yet it’s not really appropriate to discuss the details with others.  Sex is for people who are commited, responsible, and mature enough to handle it.  To the wrong eyes and in the wrong contexts, it is wrong, but within marriage, it is right.
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The temple is like this too!  It is for people who are committed, responsible, and mature enough to handle it.  To the wrong eyes and in the wrong contexts, it is wrong, but within the appropriate boundaries, it is right and awesome and wonderful.  Might be kinda weird the first time or two (like sex), but it grows more meaningful over time.  What goes on is not shameful, but we don’t talk about specifics because it is sacred.

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By the way, it must be clarified that there is NOTHING SEXUAL ABOUT THE TEMPLE EXPERIENCE.#ain’t no kinky ceremonies  #just waiting for a thunderbolt for that blasphemy

Since my first time explaining this to my friend, I have used it in certain conversations with about 15 people-Mormon/not Mormon, endowed/not endowed.  And it has gone over REALLY WELL!  They get it.  And by the way, I feel good about knowing when is an appropriate time and place to share this.  Not something I’m gonna say over the pulpit, know what I mean?

I am a virgin in both respects.  Hopefully when my time comes around, it will be rocking, in both respects.  #toomuchinformation?   #idon’tcare

CLOSING THOUGHTS

1)  I invite all people to learn about the LDS temple, and if they choose, to prepare themselves to receive the blessings associated with it.

2)  Similarly, I strongly encourage all people to practice the principle of chastity in keeping with the laws of the Lord.

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“What I am, and what I would are as secret as maidenhood. 

To your ears, divinity.  To any others, profanation.”

~Viola (from William Shakespeare’s “Twelfth Night”)

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PS.  Dear friends/readers, I kindly remind you that if you ever have questions about anything at all, you can always email me (katherineannewilkinson@gmail.com).  I wish to emphasis that I do not believe in bait-and-switching people into any religion or faith (if you think Mormons are cray-cray, it’s okay!), but if you have inquiries, I am a pretty good reliable source I think 🙂

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