“The natural [wo]man is an enemy…”
(Mosiah 3:19 in the Book of Mormon)
Toughest critic, newfound cynic, cross examine everything
Radar for threats, emotional debts, I trust only reluctantly
Riches on my mind, not quite as kind, eyeing the world ambitiously
Only a shell of my former self, where is that girl I used to be?
How can I retain my purity after tasting the fruit of iniquity?
Can I regain my innocence in the face of spiritual dissonance?
Struggle between who I am naturally
And the person that I need to be
Caught up in ideal identities
(My best friend and my enemy)
No easy victory in this internal war
I’ve lasted this long; I’ll keep fighting some more
“Got no choice but to fight, so fight on.” -John Mayer
“Life is this constant series of epiphany after epiphany. ‘Oh, I know this now. I didn’t know that then. You’re a different person today than you were yesterday.’ ”
-The lovely and effervescent Ms. Taylor Swift
Totally true! We’re always learning through trial-and-error experiences and unintentional lessons. Epiphanies can be painful, but they can also be enriching and even comical. And the real problem would be living all this time and NOT learning anything. So we just gotta try to take things in stride, I think.
What epiphanies have YOU had?
Here is the original context (so inspiring, as always):
life is a constant series of epiphany after epiphany…
So I am just looooving this chance that I have to write. To express myself and to say things that are valuable and can speak to others. It’s a gift to have the means, the skills, and the freedom to create as I do. Often times during the day I am inspired and think of things to write about! I have to keep it tucked in my mind (or in my notebook) til I can finally get to it. And I do get to it 🙂 So yes, I love the opportunity to write.
But it takes its toll, too! Inspiration is often inconvenient. Like often the best ideas come at really inopportune times (like in the middle of the night). It’s something many artists deal with. John Mayer, Natasha Bedingfield, and Taylor Swift to drop some big names. And it takes energy. Mental, emotional, physical energy. Don’t get me wrong, I ain’t complaining! Not in the least. Just expressing that truly committing oneself to one’s chosen art form can be pretty tiring.
This is one of those Mayer songs that I didn’t quite grasp or understand the first few times I heard it. But a recent listen helped me realize it is a subtle masterpiece. John pines for an older, simpler time when true art was recognized and appreciated. A time when people weren’t “celebrating broken things” like publicity stunts, reality shows, and the sick culture of the glorification of celebrity. The nostalgia for something real and substantial is a theme that appears in Mayer’s music again and again.
On a personal note, this song perfectly describes my feelings on what I call the artist’s own solution:
When no one has yet expressed what is lacking and
desperately needs to be expressed, you do it yourself.
Much of my own blog is this: no one (at least that I know of) has written some things that need to be written, so I do. I have found that I often have the gift to be able to find the words to describe the feelings/ viewpoints of others, so perhaps they might at times think to themselves that Katherine “Speak[s] for Me” (the title of John’s song)! I believe this is one of the major reasons why my blog has done so well in a relatively short time period.
Other times, some artists have already found the words to express (and often surpass!) what I feel, so I borrow from them! In case you haven’t noticed, John Mayer often is my biggest source of inspiration (duh!).
Okay, I’ve taken a terrific tangent from the song which inspired this particular post. So I’m gonna get back on track! 🙂 Though “Speak for Me” is only 3:04 in length, I could write pages upon pages about it’s chord structure, rhyme scheme, thematic substance, literary/grammatical structures, et cetera. As I said earlier in this post, this song is a subtle masterpiece.
Just one brief detail which I wish to analyze:
I’m not mad about it
But I’m not that mad about it
I’m not mad about it
But I’m not that mad about it
Repetitive? Yes. Lazy? No. Seemingly simple, but cleverly complex? Definitely! The first connotation of “mad” is angry, while the second connotation is crazy/happy about. True to character, John rarely (if ever) becomes angry about things that he wishes were different, but instead expresses a sadness. This is how I often feel myself; not one to get belligerent (except on rare occasions), but on the contrary just am sometimes sad.
Alrighty time to wrap it up for this post. As is the theme of this song, I often am disappointed in the the overall lack of quality in our world today. Not only in music, but just in people and society altogether. Our problems are far from few, and I often get frustrated when I see people compound what is already less than ideal by their (lack of) actions, words, and attitudes. But thankfully in an age of gimmicks and phonies, there are some constants we can count on. Among other things, I can always find something (to borrow the words from Ms. Taylor Swift) “good and right and real” in the music of John.
2) I haven’t seen a ton of Billy’s stuff, but what I have seen is almost always disrespectful, sacrilegious, discriminatory, inappropriate, racist, unkind, profane, rude, obscene, and just overall mean.
3) I don’t hate anyone except for Satan (although Maher makes me reconsider somewhat…).
4) I validate people who have concerns with organized religion (or otherwise doctrinally strict life philosophies). Read more here about this:
5) I don’t think all atheists are bad people (read more here!).
6) I VERY MUCH think that Bill Maher is a bad person (and I don’t make comments like that very often!).
8) There are public figures who poke fun at Mormonism (and other religious/cultural groups as well) in a way that is NOTunkind or belittling. Stephen Colbert and Jon Stewart are the ones that come to mind at the moment.
9) If you’re dying for a television fix of a gray-haired man, may I suggest checkin’ out Anderson Cooper? I am a fan of his stuff. And I even wrote him a lil’ poem!
10) We may find others’ (religious) beliefs (very) odd, but still we must find the humanity and decency to show some level of respect, even if we do not (fully) agree.
CLOSING THOUGHTS
I’m not worried about (permanent) damage that Mr. Bill Maher will do to the image of the LDS Church (cuz he can’t!). No way. We’re here to say. And he’ll be left to his own sad life. (Sorry if this is a lil’ mean-spirited).
Still, Billy Boy bugs me so much so that I devoted
(a lot of) time and effort to writing this post.
Come on now, Maher. Change yo wayz a lil’ bit, huh?
BILL MAHER PUTS A SOUR taste in my mouth…
and if I’m gonna have those particular taste-buds activated,
I’d muuuuuch rather it be because of something like this:
🙂
PS. I understand that his last name does not naturally rhyme with the word “sour;” I twisted it for a stylistic purpose. Lots of artists do this kind of thing (slant rhyme is the exact term). John Mayer does it in his song “You’re No One ’til Someone Lets You Down.” Check it stat!
PPS. Not gonna lie, I’m quite proud of this post and its plethora of literary/journalistic/celebrity/religious/historical references. Go count ’em!
