Tag Archives: Derrick Clements

I ain’t buying that one…

ImageSome of these  Autocorrect fails are funny, some (many unfortunately) are obscene, some don’t make any sense, and some of them most likely did not actually occur.

Readers, I would like to reassure you that everything you read about on this blog is legit.  Not to be arrogant, but I am talented enough (and my life is crazy enough!) to not make anything up;  Stories, experiences, and encounters immortalized on this blog have actually, LITERALLY happened.  I would swear in court.  Derrick Clement’s one and only rule for telling a story at The Porch is that it has to BE REAL!  I’m not quite as liberal as he and actually have more standards than him (story-telling wise and morally), but we certainly have that standard of truth in common.    This blog is real, remember?  And so am I.

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Sometimes when you mess up in front of millions of people…

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you just keep going….

(just watch it…)

and people think you are even MORE AWESOME than before!

Good to know for future reference…just kidding 😉

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A Simple Mormon Math Problem

15% of me wants to see “The Book of Mormon” musical,

while 85% of me does NOT:

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Pretty simple which one will win out. 

People have strong feelings about “The Book of Mormon” musical.  A ton has been written about it.  Here are (in my intelligent opinion) 3 of the best insights:

Michael Otterson’s article.

Official LDS spokesperson.  I simultaneously admire and envy this man (and his career) so much.

Plus I could listen to him read the phone-book.

The writers of the musical (South Park guys) said they researched the faith for 7 years.  Brother Otterson talks about all the things the Mormons actually DID in Africa in those 7 years.  Cool!

David Brook’s article.

He is a Jewish writer for the NY Times whom I admire very much.  He talks about how only strict doctrinal religions (like Mormonism!) can survive.  All other half-heartedly, generic attempts don’t really do any good.

Alaska Dispatch article

This piece points out that it shouldn’t be acceptable to ridicule Mormonism.

#we’re all a little curious

#the percentages might change a little bit if someone paid for my theater ticket, airfare, and lodging to NY.  I could write a review of it and put it on this blog.  just sayin’

🙂

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I used to think that many (not all) people who supported the cause of gay marriage were disobedient, wicked, and rejecting the words of the prophets

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I do not think that anymore.

Still support the LDS Church’s stance on marriage 🙂

Still believe others should as well…

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My (near perfect) approach to satire…

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When it comes to our world and its issues, there is a lot to say!

… And a lot to criticize

There are absolutely times when it’s important to speak plainly and even harshly.  To reprove with sharpness (Doctrine and Covenants 121:43) , and to not beat around the bush (From what I understand, my grandfather Ernest Wilkinson often preferred this approach.).

So I occasionally will speak harshly (but still intelligently!) about subjects, but my passion does not overrule my logic (and vice versa).

Here are 2 of my strongest examples yet:

1)  Some Mansions

2)  Halloween Costume from Hell

And there are certain topics that Katherine simply will not explore in a comedic way (humor is great, but out of bounds can be dangerous, obscene, and grossly offensive).

You will never see any joke on my blog about racism, abuse, pornography, or violence.  

And it is NOT that I am afraid of alienating readers (although I do seek to maintain them!).  It is that those jokes are not a part of my life AT ALL, and therefore most certainly will not be part of my blog.

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However, when it comes to less serious (but still important!) issues like modesty, time spent on Facebook, and dating, things that are relevant to many people but are especially present in my psyche as a Mormon living in Provo, I like to (try to) be  funny!  I often think deeply about the issue (let it cook in the crock-pot of my mind for a while), but usually say very little.  It’s that whole “economy of words” things again.

Sure I know how to write 15 page papers, but in this case, I think that often the less said, the better.  Brevity IS the soul of wit, ya’ll! As long as what you are saying is funny, uplifting, entertaining, honest, but still speaks an important truth and sparks discussion and thought, I believe that often the point gets across most clearly and perfectly.  The idea of “truth in jest” shows up in almost all of my posts, and it is the core of my approach to satire.

(2 Shakespeare references in 1 paragraph-not bad!)

Two of my greatest influences in this respect are Ellen DeGeneres and Brad Paisley.  Both are brilliant comedians and satirists (Brad is also extremely good looking and could shred a guitar to pieces), but are NOT preachy or unkind.  They respect the intelligence of their audience.  And I believe this is what makes them so good.  Check out these two examples:

Well done, you two.  Well done.  Thanks so much for your inspiration.

And now back to the woman of the hour…

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My satire may not be perfect, but it is funny, witty, occasionally sexy, intelligent, clean, refreshing, and overall pretty darn awesome, if I do say so myself.

🙂

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Satire

Sat on a tire

Kat sat on a tire

I’m tired, BYE!

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Spice Up Your Sacrament Meeting

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July 29, 2013 · 10:46 pm

an apology to Therapist “Zach”……kinda :)

*names have been changed to protect the innocent therapist

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I’m sure it’s really hard for you Zach (don’t tempt me, Michael Scott).  I’m sure you wanna show my blog to all your friends and be like:  I helped her get there!  But those dang confidentiality laws/professional boundaries.   Haha….I’m sorry for the torture.  But I also think you probz REALLY enjoy reading this blog, dontcha?  maybe not but maybe…

#catch ya on the flip side 🙂

#cant answer me…

oh and by the way this isn’t the first time I’ve communicated via code:

communicate code...

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